We need to be willing to push through the perception of oppression and subsequent defensiveness if we want to have any hope of creating a cultural system of respect and dignity, to combat and dismantle the firmly established and thriving cultural system that keeps women as unsafe as they are. Much of this work lies with us who like to consider ourselves clean-handed simply because we are not overt predators. We need to be in the arena and willing to fail embarrassingly in front of our peers, who will judge us, cast us out, and retaliate against us for violating their cultural system, the system built for us, and from which we benefit.
Keeping off the Grass
When we change the way we design, but not the way we execute what we've designed, the resultant systems might work well for all users and contexts initially anticipated, but it is simply not realistic to expect those to be the only conditions for our systems' employment. To account for this, execution itself must also be imbued with the values of the system, so every discrete employment is another test of the design of the system.